From the Train-wreck Tuesday Dept.

Although Anna Nicole Smith's zaftig action opus was high on our list of movies for BMN, we never followed through. I suspect it was just simply we feared this would be another titillating movie whose movie poster erroneously promised more than titillation. Regardless (or Irregardless as the scholarly BU residents of Allston would say) of the true reason, I've always been a fan of the outtakes from Skyscraper: couldn't be more apt for Train-wreck Tuesday.

Also: Boobs!

 

Wed. WTF

      Wednesday is usually known as Humpday; halfway through the week. This normally means an endless endorsement of 'you're almost there' comments about making it to yet another weekend of either copious drinking and non-standard mayhem (lately its felt more like the 'crying yourself to sleep with a pint of Ben a Jerrys 'Chunky Chocolate Sadness' flavored Ice cream').
      However, I came across this news that curiously made me feel the same way I feel when I watch a Twilight movie. I was angry this existed and tiny bit aroused and then angry again. So, Rather than post some Humpday Hotties, or some Warwick Davis appearances, I'll present a Wednesday WTF.


  

This Guy

And This Girl

Are Married.

Ideas for Bad Movies and Good Whiskey

While walking to work after having voted in the special election this morning to replace the late Sen. Ted Kennedy, it occurred to me that an inordinate amount of time had passed since our last blog update about whiskey, bad movies, music, new methods for hair removal, and the assortment of miscellany. I decided that I couldn't take it anymore and will now break the silence that has lasted for a better part of this winter. The blog was originally intended to serve several purposes:

• a creative outlet for my friends and me who, truth be told, are a pretty funny and talented bunch of dudes (our talents shall be explained at some point I'm sure)
• a recap of what had essentially been weekly meetings where we misbehaved in boyish fashion, indulging in poorly acted/scripted movies, bottles of whiskey or other mixed drinks (remind me to post that Hurricane recipe), and local takeout food
• a forum to plan our meetings mentioned in the previous point, which we ceremoniously dubbed "Bad Movie Night"

While the previous posts may contain an inkling or two of the aforementioned directives, we have failed to be consistent in keeping our audience entertained (and by audience, I mean us, the creators of this blog). With all of that said I would like to take the time to briefly mention where we get the ideas for the movies we watch and the whiskey we drink.

Badmovies.org is a good source of bad movie reviews and provides a forum for waxing poetic about, well, bad movies. I tend to browse the front page of new reviews for ideas on picking movies to watch during Bad Movie Night. Peaking at the list of past reviews is also helpful and picking movies based on rating tends to work out for the most part.

Bad Cinema Diary is also a decent little site with quick summaries and ratings of bad movies. It's not updated too often but it's fun to check out for movie watching ideas.

My childhood. My mother and sisters were really into watching horror movies of all types, from slashers to ghost stories to creature features. I couldn't have been older than 5 when I saw my first scary movie with my family. The title of the flick was called Humongous. I know what you are thinking. It's not porn. I don't really recall much about it other than the plot seemed vaguely reminiscent of Friday the 13th. After that, I was hooked. I would go straight to the horror/sci-fi movie section to pick out a movie every time we made our weekly trip to the video store (for more information about what videos and videotapes are, please ask our resident historian CRO). There was also a local television channel based in Houston, TX, I believe, that showed bad movies...on purpose! It was like watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 every Friday night without the MST3K part! Needless to say, when I met the boys (i.e. the blog contributors and my friends) and discovered their love of terrible movies, I had to share with them a movie I had seen on that channel as a boy. I shall only reveal the title of the movie and let you experience "bad movieness": Never Too Young to Die.

Now for the section on selecting whiskey. If you are in the Boston area, check out Downtown Wine & Spirits in Somerville. Ask for Steve. He's always willing to make recommendations on Bourbon, Scotch and whatever adult beverage you might be interested. For us, bourbon is a particular favorite as you'll see from future (and past) posts.

Well, thanks for reading and I hope you look forward to reading more as the months of cold weather break forth into Spring and beyond.

Wasmund Update.

As a guy I can tell you the only thing we like better than doing it ourselves is doing it ourselves with alcohol. A DIY single malt whiskey kit is be a no-brainer. Add the fact that you just dump the spirits into the barrel and wait 3 months makes it a project that even I can do.

Its been nearly 3 months, since Maximilian teased us with this prospect of liquor! In house! For Free! The hardest part of this has been staring at the goddamn barrel for a quarter of a year.

It seems to have paid off. The first glasses we had could be summed up as fantastic but not exactly smooth. Ive been informed this is because of barrels tend to get better with age. With each round of whiskey, the Barrel should come into its own. That being said, the whiskey from our Prepubescent vessel is astoundingly tasty. If you try it just make sure you cut it with water.

The Black Svengali has arrived!

If you've been waiting for mild pieces of insanity portioned out in 160 character chapters, your wait is over.

Tracy Morgan has Joined Twitter.





"siting here watching vh1 hiphop honors. that Tracy Morgan is a funny mother fucker."

-Tracy Morgan Via Twitter

1 Hard Ticket, Swayze and 2 Bottles Deep

This post should be aptly named "Thursday Tornado". Last Thursday, we (over)indulged in a spree of reckless abandon as the gentleman of Elmwood St and I partook in some bad movie watching, Partick Swayze memorializing, whiskey drinking and poeticizing of the wax. As the previous post mentioned, we planned to watch the Swayze gem Roadhouse to honor our beloved, fallen hero. Needless to say the night unfolded as follows:

In anticipation of the evening's plans, the Chief and I ventured down to the local liquor store to purchase a bottle of bourbon. After a few minutes of deliberating, we picked up a bottle of the Wathen's Single Barrel Kentucky Bourbon. This bourbon hit our price point sweet spot of around $30 that we typically aim for when selecting a bourbon (although a few less expensive standouts will likely be covered in a later post). There were several different responses to the whiskey. I personally felt as though there wasn't anything special about the flavor to distinguish it from a more commercially accessible Jim Beam although the smoothness was above average. However, my esteemed colleagues assessed that the whiskey had a "smooth, incredibly sweet finish" and was "good for the price". I also believe the word "drinkable" was used at one point. So essentially, we had a decent "Bud Light" of bourbons on our hands. Less filling. Tastes great.

Of course our world was shattered when Jeebus McB barged in with ANOTHER bottle of bourbon, having just stopped at the liquor store on his way back from work. This time we were hit with a bottle of Henry McKenna Single Barrel bourbon. The two things we noticed about this bourbon were its proof (contained 50% booze-ahol vs. the average 40-45% you see in many bourbons) and its felt-feeling label. A comment was made that we could drink enough bottles of this stuff to make a card table. In terms of taste, all I can say is wow. This bourbon hit me like a truck... in a good way(?). It was smooth and to me had a hint of sour cherry or citrus. I would definitely say this one is worth trying out again.

As for the movies, I will likely leave that for another post (perhaps by another blog contributor) to round out the night for everyone. Needless to say, I learned that genetic modification can occur in reptiles if bitten by mutant rats that have been exposed to toxic waste. I also learned that Patrick Swayze likes to put baby in the corner... and then rip its throat out.

R.I.P Patrick Swayze

Today is a sad day indeed, my friends. At age 57, Patrick Swayze has kicked this mortal coil after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.

When I read about this last night at around 12:30am, I felt an actual pain in my heart, and not the kind that comes after a night of eating too many wings, and drinking too much Bulleit. I was genuinely hurt, truly saddened. This was confusing to me because I usually reserve emotions like this for people I know, and it was at this point I realized I had developed a much deeper attachment to Swayze than I had imagined.

But who wouldn't? Swayze represented everything a star should be, but most times isn't. He was one of the few stand up guys in Hollywood, a gentlemen and consummate professional on set, and a loving husband off set. His values were different from most leading men, rooted in the ethics of the Texas heartland he grew up in. He married his childhood sweetheart, and they stayed together for 34 years, until the very end.

However, even if you knew nothing about Swayze the man, you had to love Swayze's contributions to film and television. When I started cataloguing his performances, I became even more bummed out. Swayze has been part of so many seminal films that I can't help but feel that a little bit of entertainment in general passed away with him.

Let's review:

First off, Swayze was in M*A*S*H. That's right. Break out the old episodes and rewatch them. He makes a cameo during the 1981 season. I only mention this because it's an oft-forgotten part of his legacy.

But lets get into the real meat of his career, beginning with The Outsiders, perhaps the ultimate brat pack movie. There are so many young stars in this film that it should be considered the cornerstone of any game of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon.

Continuing in this strain, Swayze teamed up with other soon-to-be-stars to fight off a Russian invasion in Red Dawn, which became one of the most iconic action flicks of the 1980's.

How do you follow that up? You team up with Rob Lowe, strap on some skates, and make a hockey movie that is still revered by any kid who ever hit the ice in the 80's. Several months ago, Youngblood made an appearance at Bad Movie Night, and it was glorious.

Yes, Youngblood was big, but Dirty Dancing was bigger. It still is, to this day, one of the most watched movies in Hollywood history. Even if you're a guy you've watched it at least 5 times just trying to hook up with a girl back in high school because she always wanted to watch either Dirty Dancing, Grease, or 16 Candles. Goddamnit, I didn't even get a hand job out of that.

Moving on. Steal Dawn. Swayze goes post apocalyptic. 'Nuff said. This will be reviewed for Bad Movie Night at some point, because it's full of win.

The ass kicking continues in Roadhouse... I'm not sure I even have to justify how awesome this movie is. If you haven't watched it, punch yourself in the face. If you don't, Swayze with come back from the grave and do it himself.

Rivaling Dirty Dancing as Swayze's biggest commercial success is Ghost. Lets face it, who didn't see this movie and want to get a potter's wheel? That scene is iconic with a capital "i". Furthermore, after kicking massive amounts of ass in many of his previous films, Swayze plays a man who's love is so strong it outlasts death. If you didn't get teared up at the end of this movie, you don't a have a soul.

I'll end with my favorite, Point Break. Frankly, after this masterpiece I can't even mention anything Swayze has done. It's just not worth it. It pails in comparison (with perhaps the exception of his cameo in Donnie Darko). For me, Swayze will always be Bodhi, the Bodhi-zaffa, the seeker looking for the ultimate ride.

It's also worth mentioning that Swayze starred in 2 of the funniest SNL skits ever aired. His appearance on Hans and Franz caused Franz some sexual confusion ("How could you not be looking at his buttocks?!"), and who could forget his Chippendales audition with Chris Farley? Simply amazing.

Swayze has given us so many wonderful memories, and we here at badwhiskey.blogspot.com intend to salute his by watching Roadhouse on Thursday, and toasting the man himself.

I'd like to end with a quote by Betsy Sharkey from the LA Times, that hits the nail on the head:

"Years from now, most of us won't remember "The Beast," and visions of a young, handsome Swayze will more likely spin through our memory, when he was strong and invincible. The quiet warrior, who always accorded respect to his adversary.

And so it was in the end. Cancer may have taken him, but it did not defeat him."